Mark Manson Books
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck
Everything is Fucked
Subtle Art is a self-help book that presents a completely different approach to personal development. The very essence of the book revolves around the fact that life is not about getting rid of the problems. Rather, it’s about finding better problems for yourself. Further, the book also emphasizes on the fact that one should not pay heed or give importance to the adversities, imperfections, events, or instances that are unimportant.
Thus, the Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck is about accepting all the imperfections in your life and choosing not to get impacted by all the noise that surrounds you.
It does not mean that you have to completely avoid failure. Rather, it means choosing better problems and learning how to deal with failures in life.
This article covers a few of the best Mark Manson Quotes picked up by our editors for your daily motivation. These are quotes from The Subtle Art of Not Giving AF that would give you a glimpse of what is covered in the book and would keep you going ahead in life.
These quotes talk about the value of pain or suffering, the pleasure principle, the importance of failures in life, and the importance of saying no.
So let’s have a look at the best Subtle Art of Not Giving AF Quotes to inspire you not to get impacted with the unnecessary noise.
Self-improvement and success often occur together but that doesn’t necessarily mean that they are the same thing.
Our culture today is obsessively focused on unrealistically positive expectations.
The conventional life advice – all the positive and happy self-help stuff we hear all the time – is actually fixating on what you lack.
The fixation on the positive – on what’s better, what’s superior – only serves to remind us over and over again of what we are not, of what we lack, of what we should have been but failed to be.
If you are dreaming of something all the time, then you are reinforcing the same unconscious reality over and over: that you are not that.
Giving too many fucks is bad for your mental health. It causes you to become overly attached to the superficial and the fake, to dedicate your life to chasing a mirage of happiness and satisfaction.
The key to a good life is not giving a fuck about more; it’s giving a fuck about less, giving a fuck about only what is true and immediate and important.
Our crisis is no longer material; it’s existential, it’s spiritual.
The desire for a more positive experience is itself a negative experience. And, paradoxically, the acceptance of one’s negative experience is itself a positive experience.
The more you desperately want to be rich, the more poor and unworthy you feel, regardless of how much money you actually make.
The more you desperately want to be sexy and desired, the uglier you come to see yourself, regardless of your actual physical appearance.
The more you desperately want to be happy and loved, the lonelier and more afraid you become, regardless of those who surround you.
The more you want to be spiritually enlightened, the more self-centered and shallow you get in trying to get there.
If pursuing the positive is negative, then pursuing the negative generates the positive.
The pain of honest confrontation is what generates the greatest trust and respect in your relationships.
Suffering through your fears and anxieties is what allows you to build courage and perseverance.
Everything worthwhile in life is won through surmounting the associated negative experience. Any attempt to escape the negative, to avoid it, or quash it, or silence it, only backfires.
The avoidance of suffering is a form of suffering. The avoidance of struggle is a struggle. The denial of failure is a failure.
Hiding what is shameful is itself a form of shame.
Pain is an inextricable thread in the fabric of life, and to tear it out is not only impossible but destructive: attempting to tear it out unravels everything else with it.
To not give a fuck is to stare down life’s most challenging and difficult challenges and still take action.
Not giving a fuck does not mean being indifferent; it means being comfortable with being different.
You can’t be an important and life-changing presence for some people without also being a joke and an embarrassment to others.
The point isn’t to get away from the shit, the point is to find the shit you enjoy dealing with it.
To not give a fuck about adversity, you must first give a fuck about something more important than adversity.
When a person has no problems, the mind automatically finds a way to invent some.
Whether you realize it or not, you are always choosing what to give a fuck about.
Maturity is what happens when one learns to only give a fuck about what’s truly fuckworthy.
The idea of not giving a fuck is a simple way of reorienting our expectations for life and choosing what is important and what is not.
The only way to overcome pain is to first learn how to bear it.
As with being rich, there is no value in suffering when it’s done without purpose.
Pain and loss are inevitable and we should let go of trying to resist them.
Dissatisfaction and unease are inherent parts of human nature and the necessary components to creating consistent happiness.
The greatest truths in life are usually the most unpleasant to hear.
We suffer for the simple reason that suffering is biologically useful. It’s nature’s preferred agent in inspiring change.
Pain in all of its forms is our body’s most effective means of spurring action.
Don’t hope for a life without problems. There is no such thing. Instead, hope for a life full of good problems.
Happiness comes from solving problems.
If you are avoiding your problems or feel like you don’t have any problems, then you are going to make yourself miserable. If you feel like you have problems you can’t solve, you will likewise make your life miserable.
The secret sauce is in the solving of the problems, not in not having the problems in the first place.
To be happy we need something to solve. Happiness is therefore a form of action; it’s an activity, not something that is passively bestowed upon you.
Happiness is a constant work-in-progress because solving problems is a constant work-in-progress.
Victims seek to blame others for their problems or blame outside circumstances. This may make them feel better in the short-term, but it leads to a life of anger, helplessness, and despair
Emotions are simply biological signals designed to nudge you in the direction of beneficial change.
If you feel crappy, it’s because your brain is telling you that there is a problem that is unaddressed or unresolved.
Negative Emotions are a call to action. When you feel them, it’s because you are supposed to do something. Positive emotions, on the other hand, are the rewards for taking the proper action.
Happiness requires struggle. It grows from problems.
Joy doesn’t just sprout out of the ground like daisies and rainbows. Real, serious, lifelong fulfillment and meaning have to be earned through choosing and managing our struggles.
You can’t win if you don’t play.
Adversity and failure are actually useful and even necessary for developing strong-minded and successful adults.
Teaching people to believe that they are exceptional and to feel good about themselves no matter what doesn’t lead to a population full of Bill Gates and Martin Luther Kings.
The true and accurate measurement of one’s self-worth is how people feel about the negative aspects of themselves.
The problem with entitlement is that it makes people need to feel good about themselves all the time even at the expense of others around them.
People who feel entitled view every occurrence in their life as either an affirmation of, or a threat to, their own greatness.
Entitlement is a failed strategy.Its just another high. It’s not happiness.
The true measurement of self-worth is not how a person feels about her positive experiences, but rather how she feels about her negative experiences.
Because a person can’t face his problems, no matter how good he feels about himself, he is weak.
A person who actually has a high self-worth is able to look at the negative parts of his character frankly.
Entitled people, because they are incapable of acknowledging their problems openly and honestly, are incapable of improving their lives in any lasting or meaningful way.
The deeper the pain, the more helpless we feel against our problems, and the more entitlement we adopt to compensate for those problems.
Often, it’s this realisation – that you and your problems are not privileged in their severity and pain – that is the first and most important step towards solving the problem.
The flood of extreme information has conditioned us to believe that the exceptionalism is the new normal.
Technology has solved old economic problems by giving us new psychological problems.
The internet has not just open-sourced information; it has also open-sourced insecurity, self-doubt and shame.
People who become great at something become great because they understand that they are not already great- they are mediocre, they are average – and that they could be so much great.
The vast majority of your life will be boring and not noteworthy, and that’s okay.
The knowledge and acceptance of your own mundane existence will actually free you to accomplish what you truly wish to accomplish, without judgement or lofty expectation.
If suffering is inevitable, if our problems in life are unavoidable, then the question we should be asking is not “how do I stop suffering?” But, “why am I suffering, for what purpose?”.
Self awareness is like an onion. There are multiple layers to it, and the more you peel them back, the more likely you are going to start crying at inappropriate times.
Our values determine the nature of our problems, and the nature of our problems determines the quality of our lives.
Values underlie everything we are and do. If what we value is unhelpful, if what we consider success or failure is poorly chosen, then everything based upon those values – thoughts, emotions, day to day feelings – will all be out of whack.
Everything we think and feel about a situation ultimately comes back to how valuable we perceive it to be.
People’s perceptions and feelings may change, but the the underlying values and the metrics by which those values are accessed stay the same. This is not real progress. This is just another way to achieve more highs.
What is objectively true about your situation is not as important as how you come to see the situation, how you choose to measure it and value it.
We get to control what our problems mean based on how we choose to think about them, the standard by which we choose to measure them.
Our values determine the metrics by which we measure ourselves and everyone else.
If you want to change how you see your problems, you have to change what you value and how you measure failure or success.
Pleasure is the most superficial form of life satisfaction and therefore easiest to obtain and the easiest to lose.
Pleasure is not the cause of happiness; rather it is the effect.
When people measure themselves not by their behavior but by the status symbols they are able to collect, then not only are they shallow, but they are probably assholes as well.
People who base their self-worth on being right about everything prevent themselves from learning their mistakes.
While there is something to be said for “staying on the sunny side of life”, the truth is sometimes life sucks, and the healthiest thing you can do is admit it.
Constant positivity is a form of avoidance, not a valid solution to the life’s problems.
Denying negative emotions leads to experiencing deeper and more prolonged negative emotions and to emotional dysfunction.
When we force ourselves to stay positive at all times, we deny the existence of our lives problems. And when we deny our problems, we rob ourselves of the chance to solve them and generate happiness.
Problems add a sense of meaning and importance to our life. Thus, to duck our problems is to lead a meaningless existence.